Who was I kidding.  My goatee was really coming along swimmingly, until I met a few friends for lunch.  Every one of them laughed at me.  I took it on the chin throughout the entire meal.  They said foul, crude things that painted my attempt at growing facial hair in a bad light.  I was so ashamed!  After lunch, I came home and got in the shower fully clothed and assumed the fetal position under the cold water.  After the tears stopped falling, I lathered up and shaved that crap off my face.  Who was I kidding?  Why would I want to cover up my money maker anyway?